Iris
by AmbrLupin
Summary: Present for a friend. Written parallel to ‘Baby Girl’ by ChocolateCoveredJockey. Told through a different point of view. The one she left behind.


Iris

By: Ambrlupin

Summary: Present for a friend. Written parallel to 'Baby Girl' by ChocolateCoveredJockey. Told through a different point of view. The one she left behind.

Disclaimer: I do not own Jockey, nor do I own Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls. Nor do I own Spot... Hmm. I'm seeing a theme...

A/N: This was a good thing for me to write, I think...Plus, it's a Christmas present for a good friend of mine. So...yay!

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**Iris**

**And I'd give up forever to touch you  
Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now **

There was something in the water, there had to be. No woman could be that beautiful. Shorty stood at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at her. That wasn't surprising, as everyone else was as well. But if they were looking at him the way he was, he was going to knock some heads together.

Jockey was radiant, glowing. He would thank Red for the dress later, but he couldn't keep his eyes off of her now. He took a half step towards the stairs, but that was when Spot took her arm and he mentally cursed. Damn.

Who was he kidding, anyway? There was no way the angel of Brooklyn would dare go for him. Who was he to her but a childhood playmate? An annoying little boy who was always causing trouble.

He swore on his soul that half the time Red had been seen or heard yelling, it was at him. He ran his fingers through his dark hair, eyes still glued on her frame, walking down the stairs. Red moved to her side, took her arm.

"You look beautiful, baby girl."

Jo blushed and smiled brightly at her father. "Thank you, Da…"

That was all Shorty heard of the conversation as he melted back into the newsies around him. He headed for the door, pulling his hat from his pocket and placing it on his head. Docks, his brother in everything but true blood, though they had shed enough for each other over the years, was two steps behind him.

"Where are you going, Gavin?"

"Out." Shorty stopped, halfway in the shadows, and halfway in the light flickering from the open doorway, framing the other's form. "Go back inside, Nathan."

"Aren't you coming to the party?" Docks asked softly, but it was to an empty street.

**And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight **

"Thought you weren't comin?"

Shorty stepped into the door of Irving Hall, letting the rich music envelope his soul, eyes shooting straight for where he knew she was sitting. With her father, and Spot. Damn it all to Hell and back, would she never leave them?

"Gavin." Docks poked him in the shoulder, went to shake him, and saw his eyes glaze over with determination and reckless resolve. He knew that look, very well. It often got them in loads of trouble. "Gavin, what are you thinking? What-"

For the second time that night he was left talking to air, because Shorty was moving across the floor, pulling his hat off his head, sticking it in his back pocket. He walked up to where they were sitting, her laugh ringing the air.

Stopping just shy of the table, Shorty declined his head and held out his hand. "May I have this dance, Jo?"

He saw Red and Spot exchange glances, but Jockey just blushed lightly and took her hand. "You may."

He felt like he was walking on a cloud as he swept her toward the floor, saw many people hush and look their way. It made his green and hazel eyes gleam as he looked down at her. He waited for the few seconds for the music to change, and he raised her hand, kissing her knuckles gently.

She blushed again, and Shorty felt something inside of him twist. God, she was so beautiful, it threatened to stop his heart and drop him where he stood. Realizing that to follow the thoughts in his head would lead to him being killed, he just met her eyes and pulled her into a dance.

They moved through the room, as graceful as could be, and he heard her laugh and tease about not knowing he could dance. He just smirked and spun her lightly. "There's a lot you don't know about me, Jo..."

And all too soon, it was over and he had to give her back to her brother and father.

But God knows...He didn't want to.

**And I don't want the world to see me  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am**

**  
**

He had to tell her. Today. Shorty paced back and forth outside the lodging house, feeling the rain pelt at his shoulders, sting his eyes. He had to tell her today. She was the only thing he thought about anymore, the only thing that mattered.

He swore he would tell her how he felt, every day since the dance, since her birthday. But he couldn't bring himself to meet her eyes and say, _'Jo, I love you.'_ He could match wits with the best of them, take on head to head the best fighters in the city.

But he couldn't tell one girl that he wanted to spend his life with her?

He brought both of his hands up, to rub against his face. He groaned under his breath, pacing back and forth in the mud, water dripping down his face, soaked clean through to the bone. It was good for him that Red wasn't home, or this pacing would have been done inside, and then nothing would have gotten accomplished.

Three little words, seeing as he could say her name without a hitch, but to him they were the greatest challenges of his life. Docks said he was crazy, so did anyone else he confided in. He wondered, briefly, if they were right.

Angel of Brooklyn. How often had he called her that under his breath? _A ghra._ My love. If it weren't for the fact he loved watching her pad barefoot into the kitchen in the mornings, he would have switched to another borough and save himself the heartache.

"Shorty?"

That soft, questioning tone had him spinning around so fast he slipped and landed hard on his butt in the mud. It splashed around him, sent him into a blinking frenzy as his eyes traveled up a nightgown and to her face.

Sweet Jesus, what did he do to deserve this?

She rushed to his side, trying to hide her giggles as she tried to pull him to his feet. "What are you doing out here? It's raining...Or didn't you notice?"

Rolling his eyes, his lips quirked up into a smirk. "I did notice."

Having trouble gaining her footing in the mud, she completely missed the fact water was soaking her nightgown, and making it partially see through. Shorty wasn't, however, and his mouth went dry.

"Do you even realize how heavy you ar- " She shrieked as she slipped, gasping as strong arms snapped around her, bringing her to a warm chest. Looking up, she lost speech capability and just settled for looking into his eyes.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Dammit, now.

"Jo, I have something I need to tell you." Shorty brought his hand to her face, cupping it as a thumb wiped away a touch of mud on her skin. "I...I love you."

Tears filled her eyes, mingling with the rain falling upon them both. She gripped his shirt and whispered it against his chest. "I love you too, Gavin."

Thoroughly pleased, and pleasantly surprised, Shorty tipped her face up as he kissed her, kissed her until the rain stopped and a rainbow appeared in the sky over the Brooklyn lodging house.

**And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
Or the moment of truth in your lies  
When everything seems like the movies  
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive **

This wasn't happening. This wasn't. It was a horrible nightmare.

He had seen her coming, had gotten up to greet her with a hug and a kiss. His beautiful, beautiful wife. They were supposed to be having dinner, couldn't start without her, after all. He had just gotten to his feet, her name on his lips.

When his entire life shattered before him. The men, the guns, they didn't matter. It was the bullets that entered her, that made her jerk. Those mattered. Her eyes went wide, and he screamed, leaping for her.

Red got to her first, cradling her in his arms, but Shorty took her from him, holding her close to his chest, hands stroking her hair, down her body, feeling the bullet holes. "_Mo chroi_..." he whispered, voice lost in the screams around them. His heart...

He felt the warmth on his hands, and he just about lost it. Shaking so hard he feared he was going to fall, he staggered back from her, mind going numb and body heading straight toward shock. His back hit the wall and he slid down bonelessly, hands covering his face.

In a moment he pulled back, staring at his hands, stained red. A sob tore through him, threatening to tear him apart. He couldn't look at her, so pale in Red's arms, so broken. Spot reached over, but Shorty slapped him away, tears falling freely down his face like the rain had so long ago when he had first confessed his love for her.

Oh, how ironic this was. How cruel. Did God not care what he went through? Did he not notice how much this was ripping his heart to pieces? He heard her voice, and couldn't believe this wasn't a dream. That this wasn't some horrible, horrible nightmare that he would wake up from, with her beside him saying, '_Baby...Baby, its all right_.'

She breathed her last, and Gavin's heart went cold.

**And I don't want the world to see me  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am **

"God dammit, Shorty, you have to stop." Spot grabbed his arm, shook him. "All this pinin and mournin aint gonna bring her back."

"I know that." Shorty's voice was flat, emotionless as he tossed back another shot. He rolled the glass between his fingers and refilled the glass, staring at the dark amber liquid without a change in expression.

"No, I really don't think you do." Grabbing the glass, Spot threw it onto the floor, taking small pleasures when it shattered across the hardwood. "She's gone. Gone. You have to think of your son now."

Hardly caring, the other just sat staring straight ahead of him. He knew what Spot was saying, hell, he said it nearly every day. And just like every day, Shorty ignored him and blocked out his words like an annoying fly he just couldn't get rid of.

"Do you even remember you have a son?" He demanded, getting worked up. Gripping Shorty's collar he jerked him to his feet, suddenly tired of this endless game of banter. It had to stop. For once, this wasn't even about Jockey. It was about everything. Shorty was killing himself, and Spot wouldn't stand for it.

"Let go of me." Shorty sighed, green eyes dull and lifeless.

"No." Spot hissed, "Not until you listen to me. Do you really think you're the only one who lost something dat day?" Emotion clogged his throat but he fought it down. "Do you honestly? Well, grow the hell up, Gavin. I lost my _sister_!"

Shorty froze, and Spot nodded. "Yeah...It hit home yet? You lost a wife, your son lost his mother, Red lost his daughter. But I lost my sister. So get your head outta wherever you stuck it, and start actin like the damn man Jo fell in love with."

**I don't want the world to see me  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am **

It hit home when Shorty was walking to her grave. He had never been there. He had completely passed it by like the plague. In his mind, it hadn't happened. He had been in a state of complete and utter denial.

Taking a deep breath, he brushed his hair from his face and knelt in front of the tombstone, flowers clenched tightly in one fist. It took him three times to manage a soft, whispered, '_hey, a ghra.._'and another five to get control over himself.

Laying the flowers on the grave, he was aware of the thundering overhead, and of the first raindrop to hit his hand. He tilted his face as the heavens opened up, thousands of raindrops mingling with the tears streaming down his face.

"You were everything to me, Jo. From nearly the moment I saw you. I don't know what was wrong with me back then... Same thing that still is, I suppose. But...God... Why? Why did this have to happen to us? I should have talked to you sooner, confessed to you sooner. We would have had more time." His voice trailed off, to be lost in the wind. "I never even got to say good-bye."

He supposed that was what stung the most. The fact he was sobbing on a wall, and hadn't even gotten to say 'I love you, baby.' one last time. By the time he had moved, she was gone, and there wasn't anything else to do. Death was final.

Lightning crashed, and thunder boomed, but he stayed where he was, kneeling on the wet ground, fingers tips touching the headstone. "I thought... God, I don't even know what I thought. I just miss you, baby. So much I don't know what to do with myself. I... I love you, Jo."

Leaning forward, Shorty kissed the headstone, eyes closing as his mind went back to a rainy night not so different from this one, outside of the Brooklyn lodging house, and he could swear, _swear_... He felt lips kissing him back, a hand in his hair, and his lover's voice in his ear.

**I just want you to know who I am  
**

- FIN -


End file.
